Wondering when it’ll be OK with God to post the recent visions I’ve been having…
Morning of our last service with Pastor and Prophet Jerry Fussel, God called me that morning to meditate the deepest I’ve ever done in the morning..
I mentioned some of it to sister K today on the ride to choir tonight; and on the way back home.
Maybe because I haven’t accepted it myself, or truly believe myself, or other reasons, I know I feel Him telling me to post this only when I’m ready.
I feel so bad when I can’t believe or when I discredit something so big just be…
Gosh.. the Spirit can be so loud sometimes..
As I was starting to doubt myself, it called me to stop, and lay down on my bed. After I felt that call, I looked toward my bed.. it was if someone was saying, “lie down so I can show you again.”
The truth is, I find it to be an honor- just to have one quick dream of God showing me that I was most like Kyle and Mason.
And though I know in my heart I will be teaching and ministering one day, sharing that some honor with Kyle to preach to hundreds of thousands is something I still don’t want to believe.
I think that’s the reason God made me write it down seconds before Pastor Fussel said those very words “hundreds of thousands” during Kyle’s Word.
In that morning vision, I saw the Padre stadium. It was filled, and I saw myself in the field. I was telling myself over and over as this was being shown, “I’m just there for the worship. I’m just there helping with the worship.” Then He showed me turning a page to a sermon.. I felt it there on my fingertips, the turning of the page.
I heard and felt the words I was saying. I felt my present self getting ready to hyperventilate, as if I was expecting myself to be ready to do it tomorrow.
I heard Him saying “Hundreds of thousands” and seeing 100,000s.
I felt like there was no way hundreds of thousands could fit in one stadium. That’s when He showed and reminded me of the wonderful invention of the television.
After the last night of revival, I was asking God what the relevance was writing the number “100,000s” and knowing it as ”hundreds of thousands” and its tie to my brother Kyle’s Word.
And that’s when he showed me who would also be preaching that night.
This is the first revelation I’ve ever had from Him showing that I will be working with the amazing people of this church much longer than anyone could have ever assumed.
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I’m not allowed to share the latter end of the vision. Though I trust a few would be told if they needed to know. I think this is the part where it becomes even more unbelievable- to a point where the entire vision might be nulled if I didn’t trust God at this point that it’s not going to be important for me to share it.
I guess it’s just going to be a Test for me; to see if I’d still chose to do this, despite what God showed is going to happen.
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My daughter is going to be three years old at this point. God wouldn’t let me get that number out of my head when I asked and asked.
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I always fear that everything I’m boldly stating here is.. false. But judging by the energy of that morning…. the loud taps that came each time I tried to doubt, the Spirit I felt on my hands that pronounced itself when it wanted me to pause and recollect His vision…. The Spirit guiding me to remember ”100,000s” and write it seconds before Pastor Fussel started preaching the increase of numbers to Kyle’s Word…. Faith, at this point, is showing itself to be the greater manifestation.
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Thank you great Father for the things you entrust me with; the honor of doing Your work and will… Your guidance. Thank You, for helping me in everything I do… God I hope to be able to trust others as You need me to do; I hope likewise, they will entrust the Youth Pillars and I with what You tell us to say. For the sake of everyone’s growth. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
